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5 things to do while your kids nap

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r There’s going to be a total eclipse of the sun visible across much of the United States this August. This is rare; the last time it happened was 26 years ago.

Do you know what else is so rare that it only happens once or twice a lifetime? All the kids actually napping at the same time! If you have more than one child, and all of those children are asleep at the same time, this is about as rare as an eclipse. You need to cherish and take advantage of the situation, before any of them wake up!

Here are five things you can do while your kids nap:

1. Take a shower/bath: Let’s face it, you stink. Because of your kids, you don’t get to shower as often as you’d like, and when you do, you’re rushed. When was the last time you had a long soak in the tub? Now is the time to enjoy it. You might get through an entire shower and/or bath without a toddler opening the shower curtain and telling you the names of all the body parts they know.

2. Watch an adult-ish show: Is there that one show you’ve been wanting to see, but it contains so much violence and/or sexual situations that you don’t dare watch with the kids around? Well, now’s your chance! Yes, you can finally watch the evening news. (Oh, and maybe some other shows, too.)

3. Eat from your hidden stash of goodies: We all have food that we want to eat but we don’t want our kids to eat. We’ll usually hide it from them or make up some reason to tell them why they can’t have any. Eat it now! This might be your only opportunity to eat that brownie without a toddler begging like a street urchin.

4. Work on that project you’ve been wanting to get done: Most of us have something we’d like to be doing if we just had a little more time. With the kids asleep, this is the time to build that desk, restore that old car, write that novel or even just play a video game uninterrupted.

5. Nap: All of these other ideas are great, but it doesn’t really matter what you plan to do while the kids are napping, because if you sit still for five seconds you will fall asleep. If they are tired enough to sleep, there’s little doubt that you are tired enough to sleep, too. So, go ahead and get rested up; you’ll need all that energy to make it to the next eclipse.

More funny-ish stuff every Tuesday and Friday at: slowjoe40.com.


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