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5 common New Year’s resolutions and why we don’t keep them

Joseph Capell
Joseph Capellhttp://slowjoe40.com
Joe Capell is a husband and the father of four children. When not herding the kids or working, he enjoys writing funny-ish things for the amusement of others. He’s also fond of naps and eating ice cream with his wife.

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r By Joe CapellrWhy do so many New Year’s resolutions fail? The reasons vary. Here are five common resolutions, and some reasons why they don’t succeed:

1. I’m going to eat healthier.rEating healthier means: eat less fast food; don’t drink soda; lay off the sweets; eat more vegetables; eat more fruit; drink more water. Sounds easy enough, right?

Why we fail: Have you tasted a donut? Have you tasted spinach? Which tastes better?

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Also, eating unhealthy is cheaper and easier. A jug of soda costs less than a bottle of water. And you can’t get asparagus at a drive-thru, but you can get a bacon cheeseburger.

2. I’m going to exercise.rWe all know we need more exercise. And yet….

resolutionsWhy we fail: January isn’t the best time of year for exercise. The gym is overcrowded, it’s cold outside, and it’s dark. Exercise takes effort.

3. I’m going to lose weight.rEveryone knows the two things you need to do to lose weight: 1) eat healthier, and B) exercise.

Why we fail: Really, would you rather get up at 5:00 AM, run two miles, then have kale for breakfast; or sleep in and have someone serve you bacon in bed?

4. I’m going to be better with my money.rWe spend a lot at Christmastime. So, in January we think we can spend less by staying home, not eating out, and avoiding Amazon.com.

Why we fail: It’s getting easier to spend money. We used to have to write a check or physically grab cash out of our wallet in order to spend it. These days all it takes is a click to send money from our bank account into someone else’s. Financial irresponsibility has never been so easy!

5. I’m going to spend more time with my family.rIt should be simple to spend more time with family. We live with these people, right?

Why we fail: We stare into our phones instead of interacting with the people around us. We’ll sit, five people in a room, looking at our own rectangles. (I don’t think it counts as family time if we don’t actually speak to each other.)

It’s easy to make New Year’s resolutions. It’s not quite so easy to keep them. It comes down to willpower. Put down that cookie and pick up that carrot. Take the stairs instead of the elevator. Don’t choose the “Buy It Now” option. Put down your cell phone and talk to someone.

If we do what we say we want to do, it might actually get done!

Find more funny-ish stuff at slowjoe40.com.

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Joseph Capell
Joseph Capellhttp://slowjoe40.com
Joe Capell is a husband and the father of four children. When not herding the kids or working, he enjoys writing funny-ish things for the amusement of others. He’s also fond of naps and eating ice cream with his wife.

More from Author

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I have two daughters, ages 12 and 5. Their Mom keeps them well-supplied with nice, cute, clothes. When they...

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Social distancing shouldn’t be that hard for me. Why? Because there’s not much difference between social distancing and being socially awkward, and...

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I’ve missed restaurants. Don’t get me wrong, I love my wife’s cooking. Heck, I don’t even mind my own cooking. But, there’s something about being able to go someplace and letting other

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A month ago, I had never heard of the term “social distancing.” Now, it’s a way of life.
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