Trick-or-treater beware: Size does matter when it comes to candy bars

Is Halloween candy becoming smaller every year? It sure seems so.

Candy bar size didn’t used to be an issue. Some were bigger than others, but that was OK and acceptable. A Three Musketeers was bigger than an Almond Joy. They were all “full-sized” or candy bar sized. Size didn’t really matter.

As it seems, someone decided that smaller candy bars might work better for times like Halloween. They started calling these shrunken candy bars “Snack Size.” It made it sound as if a full size candy bar was some kind of large meal no one could finish in one attempt, so they offered smaller bars that could be a “Snack.” And, it worked. People loved “Snack Size” candy bars, which were usually one-half to one-third the size of a regular candy bar. They were a great size to give away for Halloween, and you could eat two or three of them without feeling guilty.

Of course, over the years, full-sized candy bars have gotten smaller. And the same has happened to “Snack Size.” In fact, most companies have changed the name of these smaller bars from “Snack Size” to “Fun Size.” Apparently, they aren’t big enough to be considered a snack anymore, but they are still fun! The “Fun Size” bars are now only about one-fourth the size of a full-sized bar. But, people still love them. “Fun Size” is fun!

Unfortunately, someone decided if shrinking bars down to “Fun Size” was a good idea, why not make them even smaller? So nWow they are offering “Mini-Size” candy bars. The “Mini-Size” candies are less than half as big as the “Fun Size.” They’re about the size of a fingertip!

In my opinion, the “Mini-Size” is too small to even be considered to be called a candy bar. These things are about the same size as a Hershey’s Kiss, and no one calls a Hershey’s Kiss a candy bar.

The “Mini-Size” candies are barely worth the effort to unwrap. They’re so small that it’s difficult to even grasp the wrapper to unwrap it. I wouldn’t be surprised if the wrapper weighs more than the actual candy!

This needs to stop now! If left unchecked, the candy companies might keep making their candies smaller and smaller until they are the size of Pop Rocks. (And I don’t mean a package of Pop Rocks, I mean as small as each individual rock that pops). How long until they start individually wrapping each Smartie?

We need to say no to the “Mini-Size” candies. Don’t buy them. Don’t give them out as Halloween treats. “Fun Size” candy bars (if you dare categorize them as such( are acceptable, but full size is preferable. 

Sometimes size does matter!

Joseph Capell
Joseph Capellhttp://slowjoe40.com
Joe Capell is a husband and the father of four children. When not herding the kids or working, he enjoys writing funny-ish things for the amusement of others. He’s also fond of naps and eating ice cream with his wife.

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