7 Kids You See at the Playground

playground
Summer is here! That means it's time to take the kids to the park. And that means you're going to run into THOSE kids on the playground. Which kids? These: 1. The Kid Who Goes Up the Slide the Wrong Way. This kid insists on climbing up the slide while other kids are trying to slide down it. (And gets...

Kids Want to “Help”

I never thought anyone would want to watch me clean a toilet. But there I was, cleaning the toilet in front of an audience. Who would want to watch someone clean a toilet? A janitorial supervisor? Cinderella's stepmother? That's about the list, or so you'd think--unless you have kids. Yes, my two youngest children were mesmerized as I tried to scrub...

Searching for Perfection (In a Box of Macaroni and Cheese)

Nobody's perfect. Not even me. Over the years I've made a lot of macaroni and cheese. You're probably thinking, "Hey, we've all made lots of macaroni and cheese." But what I'm telling you is I've made A LOT of macaroni and cheese! I was single until I was 40 years old, so I probably made macaroni and cheese at least...

We Are Not a Perfect Family

perfect family
We have a perfect family. We have four cute kids. They are very well-behaved. They get good grades on their report cards. They are quiet and polite in church. They are always smiling and happy. They get along with others. They get along with each other. They do what they're told and say "please" and "thank you" at the...

Parents Aren’t Allowed to Take Sick Days

sick days
By Joe Capell Parents aren't allowed to have sick days. Parents can't just call in and say, "Sorry, I'm not feeling well so I'm not going to be able to parent today." You can't say, "Sorry kids, I'm taking the day off so you'll just have to take care of yourselves." And you certainly can't say, "Change your own diaper, you...

8 things NOT to get your sweetheart for Valentine’s Day

sweetheart
By Joe Capell Valentine's Day! It's an important day for anyone in a relationship. If you botch Valentine's Day for your sweetheart, the month of February, which is already cold and miserable, will become even more cold and miserable. People ask me all the time, "What should I get my wife and/or girlfriend for Valentine's Day?" (That's a lie. No one...

Let’s Give the Nod to Eggnog!

By Joe Capell There are two kinds of people: those who love eggnog, and those who are wrong. What exactly is eggnog, anyway? Is it milk? Is it eggs? Is it a milkshake? Is it dessert? Is it a drink? Is it a way of life? I really don't know, and I really don't care. What I DO know is that...

In Defense of Pineapple On Pizza

pineapple on pizza
Pizza is delicious! It's one thing almost everyone can agree on. It's the do-it-all meal featuring bread, sauce, cheese, meat (usually), veggies (sometimes), and even fruit (occasionally.) Yes, I said "fruit." You see, there is a wide variety of foodstuffs that you put on a pizza, and most of those things are accepted by everyone. You may not like a...

Daddy, Are You a Pirate?

Joe Capell
It really should go without saying, but I'm going to say it anyway: Parents shouldn't use curse words in front of their children. It's basic common sense. If you don't want your kids to swear like sailors, you probably shouldn't swear when you're around them. (You probably shouldn't swear even when you're not around them, but that's a topic for...

How did we survive without our phones?

without our phones
By Joe Capell The other day I did something unbelievably amazing. I wandered into the bathroom and sat down on the toilet before I realized: I DIDN'T HAVE MY PHONE WITH ME! Yes, that's right, I actually went to the bathroom WITHOUT MY PHONE! I know, it's incredible, isn't it? Those may have been the longest two minutes of my life....